I'm Moving!

2/5/22

6:45 AM

I’m guessing from the title you already know what this post is about...I am moving.

I'm moving to Chicago in exactly two weeks to start the next chapter of my life. Crazy.

The actual crazy thing is that I’ve been in a similar spot in my life before…

Seven Years Ago

A little over seven years ago- almost seven and a half to be exact- I was living in New York City and decided to make the move to Pittsburgh.

You see at the time, I was dating my ex who was from Pittsburgh. We started dating in college but since I was a year older than him, and I graduated a year early, I was essentially two years ahead of him in life.

So when I finished my undergrad, I moved to NYC to attend makeup school. During my three months there, I was the loneliest I had ever felt.

I loved my roommate; he was great, but I just felt so completely alone during my time there and became severely depressed. In my last month there, I wouldn’t leave my room except to go to school and the gym and that was it. I knew I couldn’t stay in New York any longer so I made the drastic decision to move to Pittsburgh.

My logic was that when my ex graduated college, I would already be in his hometown of Pittsburgh; established and settled and waiting for him to finish school.

So that’s what I did. I packed up, shipped everything to his parents house, and crashed in their spare bedroom until I found a job and an apartment of my own.

I was completely lost on who I was and what I was supposed to be doing with my life.

While his family was so generous to let me stay there, it still didn’t help ease my loneliness. The only people I knew in Pittsburgh were my ex’s family and friends. I knew no one of my own.

I remember turning 22 shortly after moving and it being the worst birthday of my life. My ex was with me, but I felt so utterly and completely alone. I was away from my family, I had zero friends, and I was in a city I knew nothing about.

I was completely lost on who I was and what I was supposed to be doing with my life.

Through the Years

Flash forward a year and a half later and I had a job, I had an apartment, I was in grad school, but I had also ended my relationship with my ex and my one connection to any sort of family I had in Pittsburgh.

At this time, I had a few friends, but no one that I felt truly myself around. Many of them ended up being superficial or that the only thing we had in common was our addiction to partying.

Because I still felt lonely and didn’t really have anything tangible tying me to Pittsburgh, I decided to move to North Carolina.

But for some reason, right before I was supposed to leave, I changed my mind; I decided to stay in Pittsburgh.

Not being a Christian at the time, I didn’t recognize that God was telling me to stay. I just knew that every time I would start to pack, I would cry.

I realized I didn’t want to start over by myself. I didn’t want to learn a new city again or find new friends or rely on anyone else to keep me company. So I stayed.

Seven Years Later

Throughout my time living in Pittsburgh, I grew and learned so much. I hit the lowest point of my life…but this low led me to bring Christ back into my life, and through Him, I am now at a place in my life that I previously only dreamed about.

Here we are, over seven years later, and packing up to move to Chicago. While I had been waiting for the man God had for me for quite some time, I never in a million years expected to find him in Illinois…but again, here we are. Six months later, and I’m packing up everything I know to go to a new city. Again.

It doesn’t escape me the irony of the fact I’m essentially moving for a BOY again, and I’d be lying if it doesn’t make me nervous to be repeating the past a little especially since that last relationship didn’t last.

This time, I am moving for a man that I know God has made just for me.

But this time it’s different.

This time, I am moving for a man that I know God has made just for me. I am fully confident in that and have not doubted for one moment that we are meant to be together.

This time, I am not solely leaning on this man to make me happy. I am leaning heavily on my faith and the fact that I am older and wiser now.

I have my own place, and I have plans to get involved with my church and fitness to make genuine connections and friends that are outside of my boyfriend’s circle.

I am moving to Chicago for the next chapter of MY life; not to become reliant on my boyfriend’s.

There has never been a doubt in my mind that this is the next move for me. The overwhelming feeling of excitement and relief that this move is finally happening is what I feel most of all.

However, that doesn’t mean that I am not sad about leaving Pittsburgh. I’m incredibly sad actually. I’m leaving what I considered home for the last seven years.

But this is the sacrifice I am willing to make to do what God has planned for me.

Goodbye, Pittsburgh

Pittsburgh has brought me love. Pittsburgh has brought me friendship you only read about and a faith I’ve always been envious of.

While I’m still not near my family, I have never felt closer to them. Pittsburgh chewed me up, but it didn’t spit me out- it helped me mature and grow fully into the woman I am today.

It has given me painful memories, but also memories of true happiness that I will never forget.

With its golden bridges, and the dark tunnels, and the odd way of saying "yinz", Pittsburgh will always have such a special place in my heart.

I became a woman here. I became a Christian. I became someone that I can truly say that I am proud to be...

So cheers to you, the 412, for seven years I will never forget…

…Here’s to Health. Cheers.